July 13, 2012 – Garden Route ~ Day 2

It’s cold as hell in this house! Waking up to a cold room makes me not want to get from underneath the covers. So I didn’t. I got dressed right under those blankets. I didn’t wake up at 6:30 like I said I would so I had to hurry. When I went to go brush my teeth, I discovered that there’s no hot water! Oh hell no! I’m so glad they had a stove in the kitchen. I had to boil some hot water in order to brush my teeth. It was about 7:30 when I decided to go get some breakfast at the café house. The bus was supposed to leave at 8:00am sharp so I had to hurry. But I didn’t hurry. I hate rushing because I always forget to bring something important.

I whipped out my sexy red umbrella and made my way to breakfast. On my way, I saw a nice, fat chicken just walking around in the yard…that must be tonight’s dinner. I got to breakfast at about 7:35, and of course everyone was leaving to get on the bus. I figured I had enough time to eat and catch the bus. The food looked so delicious. They had eggs, toast, every flavor of jam you can think of, guava juice, muffins, bake beans and a beautiful fruit salad. I ate everything I just named. When I looked up from my plate, I noticed that I was the only one left in the room. Where did everybody else go? I looked at my watch and saw that it was 8:02. O crap! I ran to the bus…I’m lying, I walked to the bus and saw that everybody had their bags and belongings with them. Why are people bringing their bags? Maxine, the IES director at UCT, said that we aren’t staying here tonight. How was I supposed to know this information? I had to go all the way back to my room to pack my bags. William M, my RA at UWC, was in the room next to mine with Theo. I looked into their room and saw them rummaging around like squirrels. “Why aren’t you guys on the bus?” I asked. “Because we just woke up.” LMAO. That answer made me feel better because I wasn’t the only late one.

When we got back to the bus Maxine was saying something about respecting other people’s time. I shook my head and boarded the bus. She let William M have it! She scolded him for about five minutes. That poor guy, he just had rough night. I’m not even mad that I was late because breakfast was amazing; I was too elated for anyone to bring my spirit down. I supposed that’s how people feel after they’ve smoked weed? See my little children, there are other things in life that can put you at complete ease – Food being number one.

Today we’ll be doing more fun activities. First we will be canoeing up some random river in the mountains. Then later on, we have a choice between going to an elephant sanctuary, or visiting some monkeys, or paragliding, or seeing the Tenikwa wild cats. Of course I chose to see the wildcats. How can I come all the way to Africa and not see a leopard and a cheetah? And plus this was the cheapest option. It cost way too much just walk next to en elephant and have him eat out of your hand. And who the hell would want to see some crazy monkey so early in the morning? They are too mischievous. Before we could get off the bus, we bombarded with a bunch of big cardboard boxes. OMG! MORE FOOD? Now I was getting sick of eating. How many times are we going to get fed? We literally JUST had breakfast. But I took like three bags of food anyways. I wasn’t hungry, but I could still eat.

So about the canoeing trip – it was too damn cold to be splashing in river water. It was like 12 degrees Fahrenheit outside, and it was raining as usual. A few of us decided to stay on the bus~ Dontranika, Kayana, Will, William M, Theo, and me. We are the smart ones who don’t want to get sick in another man’s country. I watched the others from the bus window as they dressed from head to toe in black garbage bags. They looked like a moving garbage disposal. Some of the boys from UCT took their shoes off so that they won’t get wet. What? You will have dry shoes but you will come back to the bus with frost bitten athlete’s foot. Great decision.

As they canoed, the rest of us went to go watch people bungee jumping from a bridge. Now that’s one thing you won’t get me doing. The fall was too far down. And it looks even scarier because it’s smacked between two huge mountains – so it seems as if you’re falling into hell. I admire the jumpers for their bravery though. I think after you bungee jump there is nothing else to look forward to in life. That’s at the top of the list of crazy things you’ll ever do before you die. I’ll leave that for when I’m 89 years old.

I felt a drop of rain and immediately sprinted to the bus. LOL. I could get recruited to the Olympic track team at the rate I was running from those raindrops. A few minutes later, the canoe group came back looking like frozen chickens. They tried to pretend that they had the time of their lives but we weren’t buying it. They were like “OMG, that was so much fun!” No it wasn’t LOL, you look like you couldn’t wait to get back to the bus.

The bus left after everybody got settled in. We made our way to the paragliding (zip lining) area first. The people who chose this particular activity got off the bus…in the rain. Next stop was the elephant sanctuary. The people who wanted to walk with elephants and feed them got off the bus…in the rain. Then there were the few, the proud, the wildcats! The bus driver saved the best for last. When we got off the bus the rain stopped – because God likes us better, the sun started shining and one wild lion somewhere in the world roared its biggest roar.

We waited in the gift shop area for our tour guide to come get us. I know it’s not a coincidence that we have to wait about 15 minutes in the gift shop before we started our tour. That’s just designated time for tourists to spend as much money as they can while they anxiously wait. It’s proven that people tend to spend money when under stress, whether good or bad stress. My sources? …My mom and her friends. The tour guide came to get us and brought us into an empty room with benches. He had a move set up for us to watch before we began our tour. The movie basically gave us some background history on the African cats and their endangerment. It also gave us safety tips for when we come into contact with them.

And then we were off! We visited the lonely leopard first. He had a whole section to himself because he needed space to run and exercise. He was very well caged in because he’s not afraid to attack people. Even though he was in the biggest cage I’d ever seen, I was still scared. If he had jumped up onto the side of the cage, as the tour guide said he has done before, I would’ve peed myself. But he didn’t. I got a few photos and videos of him licking his paw; he’s so cute…and BIG. We then saw some other cats that I cared nothing about. I just wanted to get to the popular demanded ones.

African Wild Cat

 When we finally got to the cheetahs I was very excited. By this time I wasn’t afraid of the cats anymore. Well, until the tour guide opened the gate told us to walk in. Excuse me sir? How about you go first so I have time to run while they eat you? He reassured everyone that they wont attack us if… (1)we keep standing tall, (2)don’t make any sudden moves, and (3)speak softly. What?! He just told me to not be myself around these two cheetahs. He brought in another guy who works with the cheetahs everyday. The guy’s job was to keep the cheetahs calm while we look at them, touch them, and take pictures. When it was my turn to take a picture, the female cheetah turned around and showed me her teeth. Oh hell no! I wasn’t about to be anybody’s dinner while I’m in Africa. My body was telling me to run, but my head reminded me that I couldn’t make any sudden moves. So I just stood in one spot until the cheetah realized that I was the boss and she needs to sit the hell down.

I knew it was time to leave the cheetah’s territory when the female one started running around. Her ears got erected and she was sniffing around suspiciously. “Excuse me Mr. Tour guide, I think she wants us to leave.” He eventually took my advice and left them alone. I can definitely say that is he closest I’ve come to being eaten by an animal. I think I would’ve been totally fine if a cheetah bit me because that would be an awesome story to tell my friends and my children in the future. Unfortunately I wasn't bitten, so we’ll have to stick with this lame story.

We moved on to looking at some little animals that look like a cross between a chipmunk and a rat. They were the ugliest things I’d seen up until we walked to a green pond area. There were some birds about as tall as Musiq Soulchild, with some long beaks. Yuck, they were so ugly that I had to take several pictures of them. Our tour ended with the ugly looking birds, but I still had the thought of the cheetahs in my mind for the rest of the day. Wildcats are amazingly beautiful animals.

Everyone got back on the bus as we headed to the elephant sanctuary to pick up some people. They took a long time to get to the bus so I decided to go inside. It was dark and scary but they had a fireplace. BINGO! I warmed myself up for a bit, but my mind kept roaming. I wonder if anyone will try to stop me if I go back there? I walked to what looked like the backyard of the place, and there they were! I saw the elephants…FOR FREE! Hahahahaaha! I just got something for free that people actually have to pay for. There were no security guards or people who took themselves too seriously, so I figured I can do whatever I want to. I got on the swings and relived my high school days for a bit. Then I made myself a cup of tea and drank it by the fireplace. I still don’t know whether or not any of those amenities were free. But hey, THIS IS AFRICA!

After my free luxurious spree, it was time to leave. We were driven to another lodging place. This place probably looks ten times better when it’s not raining. The entrance looks like a place for a wedding. We walked under vines that blossomed beautiful flowers. Dontranika and I ended up being roommates again. Kayana and Will were roommates in a room across the courtyard. Our rooms were the cutest I’d ever seen. And the courtyard had a water fountain in the middle that reflects light into your room at night. It’s like sleeping in an aquarium…a very cold aquarium.

We were called down to dinner about an hour later. The food was gross. There wasn’t much to choose from, and the main course was beef. I don’t eat beef. So I had carrots for dinner. -___- I wasn’t hungry anyway. After everybody ate we went back to our cute little rooms to chill. Kayana, Theo and Will came to my room. We talked about everything under the sun. It was a funny night…up until Theo started talking about witches and curses. He tried to cast a spell on me with his lucky rock that he bought at the Wildcats place. That boy needs Jesus.

I told everyone that I was about to take a shower (hint to get the hell out). They all got out, but as soon as I got ready to lock the door William M and one of the UCT RAs came in. DAMN! Just when I thought I could get some sleep. I tried to keep the conversation short but it wasn’t working. After about 30 minutes of trying to get these guys out, I was finally successful. I go to take a nice, hot shower and sleep like a baby. They had heating blankets too!!! I slept peacefully on clouds.